Sometimes,

Sometimes: the best way to get from point a to point b is to converge at the infallible intersection of being intertwined with an individual…

today i laced my coffee with heterosexual intentions.
say i can't take it black like you do, so brave and brash. positive reception.
my shot glass is always half-full though, doubts flooding it to the brim.
you down yours with a pint of stallion-scented supremacy – living quickly, carelessly... on a whim.

sappho has sent me into exile. 
maybe this is worth it, i think... maybe your side of the world is worth my while.
suddenly my lover is not my bag of bones to bury in my bunker;
the surprise of professing the wonders of our romance beyond the closet hidden six feet under.

my eyes saw your entity beyond the conventions and constraints,
but my hands slipped into yours, the sizeable difference beyond restraint –
my heart tugged at how physically, and traditionally, between us, i was small
finally normal for once, finally collapsing at the common benchmark – my identity overhauled

happiness with you meant calculated free falls and second guesses,
wishing i could smell the flowers in your hair or put you in my dresses
the patriarchy is beyond heaven, hell, purgatory, and everything on the rise
you're in a club i'll never get in, with your friends i will always secretly ever-so-slightly despise

in that relationship, i imagined, it would be possible to enjoy multiple chapters of life
but i also saw a future scribbled with regret; with the possibility of being nothing more than a wife
i don't want to live in tomorrows with a constant sucker punch to the gut –
one day i will wave my colors and tell the world who i am; no ifs, thens, or buts.